Bibliophile Holidays

I find the Christmas/New Year holiday period quite depressing. Never being asked to spend Christmas Day with family, I always feel as though I am impressing myself on a family who care for me but are not related. Everyone disappears off to the beach, cycling the country, camping in remote areas of New Zealand I will probably never see again and leave me wanting. Loneliness rears its ugly head and days are filled with little more than sleep, eating and reading. Although I set goals annually it is difficult to get motivated to begin them in January. Usually I undertake these goals in fits and starts and many fall by the wayside as the year progresses.

Yet books and reading remain my steady companions. I read almost 80 books in 2022, some of which were quite large and took a concentrated amount of time. Some I continued to read although they did not really enthuse me. Others I could not put down. As I read several books at once, and have to keep the genres separate, two talking books and a kindle book keep my mind active. I have already finished a couple of books this year, the most interesting one being We Belong to the Land by Elias Chacour, a Palestinian priest from Israel. His documented efforts to bring the Israelis and Palestinians together have earned him many international accolades. This is a book well worth reading. I hope to soon read another book of his, Blood Brothers. Apparently it documents his early life and decision to enter the priesthood. 

       

Horrifying

 I am only part way through the book 'The Girl in the Green Dress' by Jeni Haynes. It is such a horrifying tale of parental sexual abuse that I think it deserves to be read by everyone. Sexually abused by her father from the age of six months his horrific predatory and controlling behaviour which he predicated on his tiny daughter makes me ill. She describes it in detail in a way that others who have experienced this would probably be unable to. Her chapters are interspersed with those written by her psychiatrist who explains that Jeni's many and diverse multiple personalities were developed to help her cope with the abuse. It took her many years to find a doctor who understood, and to get police to believe her as so many thought she was just making it up. Please read this book, it is difficult, but these women need to be affirmed.

My life has been full of appointments lately and I have had little time for blogging or writing. Four of my stories have been selected to be published in a British anthology. It makes all the hours spent slaving over a hot computer worthwhile. I have several memoir essays underway at present, they are thoughtful writing which takes time and lots of patience and editing. I prefer to just write, accept the mistakes made when writing too fast, and try not to forget the insightful thoughts I have while putting others into the story. I so wish that others would be more interested, more supportive of my writing. I think I might also try some other genres soon, that will be exciting.

My guide dog is in need to a good walk, and Jay needs a quick stroll in the park. He is due for his medication check next week. Hopefully they will give him some more prednisone to help with his IBD. Maya still attracts a lot of attention when out and about. She is much admired by everyone except taxi drivers who seem to find her spring moult dificult to deal with.          

Writing Groups

 Several weeks ago I attended a memoir writing workshop with Dame Fiona Kidman when the participants were asked if they wanted to set up a memoir writing group, the majority were very enthusiastic. After obtaining all their emails I sent out an email with a date for a meeting, yesterday at our big central library. Arriving early and finding that a Toastmasters group was meeting there and had used all the tables I hauled chairs into a circle and waited, and waited and continued to wait. Eventually one person turned up and then another. We waited. Giving up after about 20 minutes we just started chatting, talking about everything from local body politics to heritage interviewing, the role of the library, and what writing we had done. Two hours later we finally called it a day and dispersed. Disappointed at the low turnout we have decided the group is a no go. I wish people would not say they would like to start a group when they are really not interested. I put several hours of work into setting this up and felt quite used. I now have to send out another email asking if people do have any interest in this writing group.

I will continue to write memoir pieces, but since the advent of covid I do find it very lonely that people have moved on with their lives with little consideration for those of us still having to isolate much of the time. Memoir essays seem to suit me, I can cover a range of topics both light and serious.

I have done a lot of reading lately, 8 books last month. These were a mix of books I have on my kindle and my talking book machine. Having 3 or 4 books on the go at once must seem like madness, but books are who I am.

The one which probably gripped me the most was Adopted: Love, Loss, Family and Reunion by Brigitta Baker and Jo Willis. A very easy to read book it is divided up with their stories of being adopted, the journey of their birth parents, the huge difficulties of their reunions, and even includes a section of comments by their children.

The Mirror Book by Charlotte Grimshaw is another gripping book of family dysfunction in a well know New Zealand literary family. Once I got into the second half of the book I found the stories she told of their family anger and angst relatable to my own life experience. I highly recommend both these books.

                   

The New Bible

 I have just finished reading Dame Fiona Kidman's book 'So Far, For Now'. It has given me the guidelines for writing memoir pieces of varying lengths. I have already begun writing a longer piece using her ideas and I am buzzing with more enthusiasm than I have had in months. Beginning with her description of the sudden death of her husband she ranges from her time in Menton in France, to travel in Britain, having a massage, family connections and much more. I have three pages of ideas to work on, I am beginning to think I might need to work on several ideas all at once to keep my enthusiasm going. 

Several other writers have suggested I should write short memoir pieces rather than trying to put together a memoir which was giving me PTSD. I hate having to give up on writing I have spent months and months on but sometimes the stress and tension of reliving difficult times makes it too hard to continue. I think people who manage to complete a long and difficult account of their life are amazing for their strength and fortitude.

I have always been an avid reader of Fiona Kidman's books. We have much in common, she was a librarian, avid reader, lived on a farm and milked cows, and so on. I just wish I had been able to write with such vigour all my life. I guess my many years of academic writing meant that time was spent getting academic qualifications of which I am proud. I am so looking forward to meeting her tomorrow and having 3 hours of intense instruction in memoir writing skills.

   

  

Immigrants

 I have just finished reading a book called The Ten Pound Fare.

It is full of interviews and analysis of the British people who took advantage of this offer to emigrate to Australia after World War Two. While some saw it as the opportunity to take a 2 year working holiday, many stayed and made a life for themselves in Australia. Yet some were desperately unhappy and returned home as soon as the two years were up, others even sooner as they could not fit into the relaxed way of life in their new country. One theme which ran through the book was the number of women who failed to settle as they missed their Mum. I have always been quite bemused by the way British women cling to their mothers, often ringing or visiting them several times daily. Perhaps they have never understood the 'leave and cleave' scenario. While of course family is important somehow the British take it to extreme lengths. Many of the men in this story were very happy in Australia and had good jobs but were persuaded to go home by their spouse.                                           

I think the fact they were treated well on the ships out and then ended up in either hostels or rental accommodation until they found employment made it much harder for many of them. One has to wonder if they truly understood the advantages of living in a country desperate for new citizens following the war. 

My father emigrated from Manchester to New Zealand in the 1930's. I imagine he had to pay his own fare but as he left without telling anyone where he was going it must have taken some great courage to travel to the other end of the world not knowing what the outcome would be.                                                              

I highly recommend this short book for a look into a part of history many have forgotten.                                                           

                

   

Syria

 I have just finished reading A Disappearance in Damascus by Deborah Campbell. It was one of those books which was difficult to put down, despite the fact I was reading it as a talking book. I kept turning it on for 15 minute intervals on and off all night as I followed the story of Deborah and her 'fixer', Oflam. The descriptions of how the Iraqi refugees lived in Syria and their fears for both themselves and loved ones at home is difficult to read. The mix of Western journalism and misunderstandings about the Arab world overlapping with the daily grind and slivers of hope the refugees had of a better existence offers an insight into how we, the privileged of this world view those whose lives are such a struggle.

I have read many books like this, some suggested to me by a friend who lived and studied peace resolution in Israel. Her experience has often tempered my thinking about the way we treat other people to justify our own ends. I never fail to be upset by the way the nation of Israel treats the Palestinians, especially considering the long reach of the Holocaust. Where does the juncture fit, why do the pieces not seem to be aligned perfectly. Yes, this is human nature. I live in a country where those of us in the majority, descended from settlers from Europe, are struggling with the demands of the 16% of the population who claim to be indigenous. They also arrived in canoes, not ships with white sails and settlers with guns. Unfortunately in this changing world they are bringing racism upon themselves. Divisions are growing between those of us who have worked for decades to ensure a safe future and are now watching it dismantled by this small number of people in a multi-cultural community. We need to work together, understand each other, and not push for dominance. 

 

           

Muslim Joy

 I have just finished reading a book called 'Tea with Arwa' by Arwa el Maasri. It is the story of a young Palestinian girl who emigrates to Australia, although her father keeps returning to the Middle East for work. It projects the difficulties of the stark reality of living in a country where being Muslim is still quite rare. Arwa makes a decision as an adult to wear a hijab, something that obviously has a profound meaning for her. This book is fascinating, particularly the inclusion of the recipes which form the conclusion of each chapter. The food sounds so delicious I was tempted to find a Middle Eastern restaurant where I could try this food. Then I remembered, Covid.

Going out to cafes or restaurants is not a sensible idea at present as we have an omicron variant striking down so many of our population. Social media is full of vitriol for people taking precautions. Perhaps they could take a leaf out of the book of this family with links to the NRL and their joy and peaceful life. 

 

  

 and welfare of others by criticisng those who wear maks,