Saturday 18 January 2014

Looking Forward

This morning I received this post from Letters of Gratitude on my Facebook page.
"I've been stabbed in the back by those I needed most. I've been lied to by those I love. I have felt alone when I couldn't afford to be. But at the end of the day I had to learn to be my own best friend because there's going to be days when no one is going to be there for me but myself".

My friends are amazing people but family have, in the main, walked all over me and the reactions of my children to my separation and divorce from their father is completely represented by the above quote. They have stamped all over me, lied to me and fail to explain why. I hope I am my own best friend but there are days when all I want is a friend to hug me, to perhaps see my grandchildren who I wonder if I would even recognise and to feel I mean something to a family member. Perhaps this is why I like quotes so much as they provide a salve to a person requiring answers. 

My reading has finally descended into holiday mode, probably because many people have returned to work while I am still relaxing despite nursing a large wound on my arm from surgery. I have a large pile of Healthy Food Guides www.healthyfoodguide.co.nz  on my coffee table which visitors seem to peruse more than me. The latest issue arrived in the mail late last week but I have not even opened it yet. I have borrowed a large pile of Homestyle  magazines from the library and am really enjoying looking at ideas I could put to use in my home. My visit to the library was an off-the-cuff affair concurrent with my feelings that I should not put off any ideas in case of missed opportunities. I also found a book I am now enjoying; A French Garden Journey by Monty Don, though it does not seem to be about French Gardens but more about his journey's through France. I have read another of his books but enjoy his manner and way he discusses his gardening projects on his television programmes. As I continue with A Reader on Reading I am finding it very thought provoking. 

The Road to Le Tholonet: A French Garden Journey
   

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